Poem (age 12) "dream"

I never had a mother
I never had a father
I hardly have a family
So why do i bother
Im just trying to live my life
To the fullest that i can
Just trying not to kill myself
Thats always been the plan
I could just run away
But then my family would miss me
I could break down and cry
But then my friends would diss me
No one understands
I dont make it a big deal
No one understands
I wish my life wasnt real
I am constantly yelling
At people who say their life is bad
Because Im so sick of it
They have the life I never had
I curse out my mom
And dont think of her when im not
I hate my mom
For all i care she could rot
Where in the world she is
I really dont know
Shes being really stupid
Shes stooped way too low
Probably out doing drugs
Or looking for another boyfriend
She already has 4 girls
When is it gonna end?
Im holding onto my friends
Befor theyre gone too
Never gets any easyer
and its nothing new
And sometimes i worry
That one of them is lying
And to me, losing a friend
Is like a best friend dying
I cant afford to lose anything else
Ive already lost all hope
My life is falling apart
Cuz my mom is nothing but a dope
So i have to cry
I have to scream
I just wish things would get better
But all I can do is dream