Poem (age 14)

how could you expect me to love
when all i've known is hate
how can you think you can help me
when youre fourteen years too late
you want me to tell you everything
do you really think its not hard
to just come out and say
why im so scarred
how can i speak in words aloud
of times i felt so alone
of the way i feel inside
of all my problems at home
how could i ever tell you
that when i walk alone in the rain
silent and unnoticable as it may be
im crying away my pain
how can i just speak of
my many sleepless nights
trying to cry myself to sleep
as my family fights
how could i tell you
that im so scared to fall in love
because every time i try
it gets shot down from above
i try to make everyone understand
through these poems that i write
but no one sees its all true
that im really not alright
Take a look in my eyes
And let them speak the truth
let them tell stories of how
i cried away my youth
let them reflect an image
of what i really am inside
let them tell you of my fears
which i try desperatly to hide
you say im slow to catch on
but i can see things coming from a mile away
you say i look really happy
but you have no clue how many tears i've cried today
I've told you time and time again
to pay more attention to my silent crys
this poem was meant to help you understand
but i think its just another one of my failed tries